As Felipe and I walk forward, we are learning that we (and many other people) have had many misconceptions about birthmothers. And I have to say that as we first stepped into domestic adoption, "open adoption" was the thing that scared us the most. However, as we learn more and now as we are in relationship with an actual woman who is carrying a baby that we may parent... things have changed.
Here are the misconceptions we've come across and had to deal with in our own hearts: #1-She doesn't love her baby. She must not care b/c she's giving it away. #2: I think for most of us it's easy to vilify her and put her in the "bad person" category in our minds. She wouldn't be a good parent anyway.
How wrong we've all been. In actuality, I've now come to see our birth mom as one of the bravest women on the planet. We've now written a couple of letters and the thing that shines through the most in her writing is how much she loves this baby... And what a beautiful person she is. I won't list specifics in how I see this, so you'll just have to take my word for it. She's beautiful... and I've never seen what she looks like :) I see how she is trying to do the best thing she can for her child... to give them a hope and a future. I see the heart of God in her. She is sacrificing herself for her child.
So, this coming Saturday, my glass will be raised to birthmothers across the globe and to a particular one that I've come to love deeply. It's amazing how I see my heart being knitted together with this special woman. I think it's the beginning of something so amazing, so mysterious. I think I'm learning Love on a new level. Isn't that what parenthood does?
Bless you friends who have given to our fund and who have prayed us into this place! Please forgive us for not responding immediately and individually to each one of you. We will. We are "nesting" and "adopting" both of which require lots of work. Our home is currently in disarray as every room has been rearranged in order to make a guest room a baby's room. The baby is due 4 weeks from tomorrow! We are currently at 82% of our goal! Only $2,186 to go!!! I'll write more soon about all the miracles we've seen along the way! We feel so much love in our hearts!